Throw Me Off
by KnightandJesterArt
Summary: KakuHida OneShot. Kakuzu has been pushing Hidan to his limit on their past few assignments and bounty collections, which causes the young Jashinist to fall unconscious. Will the miser put his greed aside for once in his life, and allow his partner to get some rest?
Hidan and Kakuzu had just finished a series of missions, as well as two back-to-back bounties. The old miser was perfectly used to little sleep and a lot of work, which made it easier on his body to move from one assignment to the next. Hidan on the other hand, was working towards exhaustion. Both physically, and mentally. The young Jashinist was sitting outside waiting for his partner to collect his payment for their latest delivery. From what Kakuzu had told him, the man they'd assassinated had a pretty high bounty on his head. Which meant that Hidan would be waiting even longer than usual for his greedy partner. For when there was more money involved, there was double the counting on Kakuzu's part. Hidan sighed as he sat and waited, and waited… "Man this blows. The fuck do I have to help him with these bounties for?" He was too tired to care that he was thinking out loud, and continued to ramble on. "Actually, why the fuck do I _offer_ to help him?" He grumbled and groaned to himself for a while longer, cussing his partner out several times in the process.

Half an hour later, Kakuzu emerged from the old run down building that doubled as a collections office. He had his briefcase, full of money, slung over his shoulder, and a semi-satisfied smile was adorning his features. Not that anyone could tell, mind you, for he still had his mask on. He walked over to the stone steps where he had left his partner, and gave a soft sigh. "Well, as it turns out, that man was worth more than I originally thought; we have some extra spending money now. What do you say we find the nearest village and get something to eat?" Kakuzu raised a brow when he received no response. _"That's odd… Usually he'd be jumping up and down like a child by now."_ He walked a little closer to the slouched figure in front of him, and gave a low growl. "Hey!" He tapped his foot against his partner's back, which just resulted in Hidan falling down the small staircase face-first. "Hidan?" Kakuzu stepped off the cement sidewalk, and turned his partner over. _"Good grief…"_ He exhaled a soft sigh when he saw that Hidan had fallen asleep. _"I guess we're skipping dinner and finding an Inn…"_ He set his briefcase down momentarily, so that he could put Hidan on his back. He picked the briefcase back up, and headed off to find a village for them to stay in.

It had taken the miser a few hours to find a small village. It was located on the outskirts of the hidden mist, so he didn't think they'd have to be too cautious during their stay. Normally he wouldn't part with a single penny unless they were in need of shelter from bad weather. But for some reason, he was feeling generous. He paid for a small room, and said that he would like it for three days. Nothing more than futons were necessary, so he told the receptionist to give them something basic. After receiving his key, Kakuzu hauled Hidan up the staircase, and into their room. He not-so gently dropped Hidan on the floor, and laid out a futon for the sleeping boy. The miser had to chuckle at himself. To most people, Hidan was a young man, but given their age difference… to him, Hidan _was_ a boy. He carefully tucked his young partner into the futon, and sighed softly as he sat beside it. The ex-takigakure ninja was resting against the wall, and closed one eye as he yawned. _"You're not looking too hot, kid."_ He watched over Hidan for a while longer, before giving into sleep.

The next few days had been utterly boring for Kakuzu. Hidan hadn't woken up at all since their stay at the Inn. Not only had he found himself _missing_ Hidan's loud mouth, but he hadn't even thought twice about extending their stay. He'd just waltzed downstairs, and asked the receptionist if it was possible to stay for a few more days. She'd been more than happy to oblige, and had even given him a discounted price on the extension. It wasn't until the fourth morning, that Kakuzu had seen movement from Hidan. The miser had been sitting against the wall, silently observing the other male, with a frown on his face. He blinked lazily when Hidan started to stir. _"Are you going to wake up at last?"_ When Hidan still didn't wake up, Kakuzu sighed and closed his eyes, relaxing further against the wall.

After a few more minutes, the young Jashinist yawned, and slowly opened his eyes. He groaned and grunted as he stretched his muscles out, before sneezing lightly. _"Shit, I'm cold!"_ He sat up and noticed that Kakuzu appeared to be sleeping against the wall. _"Well, I may lose a limb or two, but at least he can't kill me…"_ The silver-haired man carefully rose from his place on the futon, and crawled towards his partner. He gulped softly, and just as he was about to climb onto Kakuzu's lap, one of his eyes opened. Hidan's breath caught in his throat. _"Oh shit!"_

Kakuzu raised a brow in amusement. "And what exactly is it that you think you're doing?"

Hidan gulped again. "I.. I'm cold, so I thought… I mean you're much larger than me, you should have plenty of extra body heat. Surely you can set aside your greed for a few minutes?" He could only hope that worked, he had absolutely no faith in Kakuzu's ability to be nice.

"Hmm, funny you should mention that… see, I've already set it aside to get you this hotel room. I had originally planned on us only being here for a couple of days, but then when those days had come to an end, you still hadn't woken up. I had to extend our visit for another few days, so you've just cost me a week's worth of funds." Kakuzu had been fully serious in what he'd said, but his tone was light-hearted. Even so, that didn't stop all five of his hearts from skipping a beat when he caught sight of the guilty look Hidan was giving him. "Don't make that face Hidan, it doesn't suit you." Rather roughly, the miser pulled his young partner down against his chest, and gave him a soft pat on the head. "You may steal some of my body heat for five minutes, and five minutes _only._ Understood?"

Hidan's eyes went wide as his face collided with Kakuzu's chest. "Uhh.. Okay…" He willed himself to relax against the larger male's form, and giggled after a minute or two had passed.

This caused the miser to raise a brow. "I haven't said anything, what the hell could possibly be so funny, Hidan?"

"Ah sorry, it's just… I never noticed that you could hear all five of your hearts beating like this. Although one of 'em seems to be beating faster than the others." He yawned softly, and nuzzled into a more comfortable position. "And now they're all kind of beating fast." He started to sit back up so that he could look at Kakuzu's face. "Hey, you're not having a fucking heart attack, are you—!" Hidan hadn't even gotten a glimpse of Kakuzu's face before he was violently shoved a few feet away. "Ow! Fuck! What the hell was that for?!" He was about to start cussing up a storm, when he noticed Kakuzu wouldn't look at him. "Huh? K-Kakuzu?"

" _There it is again… why the hell do my hearts increase speed every time this damned idiot says something stupid?"_ Kakuzu growled. "Come here…" He still refused to look at his partner, and his voice had been completely muffled by his mask.

Hidan blinked. "I'm sorry, you maybe wanna speak the fuck up?"

Kakuzu took a deep breath and exhaled through his nose. "I said: come here."

Rolling his eyes, Hidan made his way back over to Kakuzu's lap, and nuzzled against his chest. "If you wanted to cuddle, then why the hell did you throw me off in the first place?" He gave his partner a skeptical look, and patiently awaited an answer.

"Because you were spouting nonsense."

"Y'know, that ain't much of an answer, Kakuzu. I spout nonsense all the fucking time. Why'd you get so pissed when I said that thing about your hearts speeding up? Are you self-conscious about the way they sound or some shit?" Hidan was becoming increasingly curious at this point, for his partner was never one to beat around the bush.

Kakuzu sighed deeply, and roughly pulled Hidan back down against his chest. _"This damned brat… Always causes me so much trouble."_ He held onto the smaller male with an almost unbearable grasp. "If you're going to sleep, then sleep. But if not… well there's no need for you to keep staring at me with those big, pink eyes of yours…" His voice was unusually quiet, which made the miser even more agitated than he already was. He gently set his chin atop Hidan's head, and sighed into the silky grey locks. "Just shut up and don't say anything else." He loosened his grip on Hidan ever so slightly, but still held him close. "The longer we remain silent, the longer I'll hold you… deal?"

Hidan smiled and nodded against Kakuzu's chest. He was starting to like the sound of those five hearts beating in unison, and that was enough to keep him from speaking. _"If I didn't know any better, I'd say I embarrassed the old fart."_ He decided to peek up at his partner after a while longer, and smirked suddenly. Kakuzu had fallen asleep like that, and for once, didn't seem so menacing. _"Could it be he'd been too worried about me to sleep properly? I suppose I should thank him..."_ He sat back, and carefully pulled his partner's mask down. He took a deep breath before slowly pressing his lips against the other man's. Feeling slightly embarrassed with his own actions, Hidan laid back down against Kakuzu's chest, and blinked several times. _"Huh… That actually felt kind of nice…"_ He yawned after a moment, and slowly closed his eyes. "It's a shame you weren't awake for that Kuzu… I don't think I have the courage to try that a second time." The young Jashinist soon found himself drifting off to sleep, completely unaware of the smile adorning his partner's face.


End file.
